Take a break >> Get my ideal weight back!

Hola sista,

I just finished crying...crying like a fat baby!! :(

Today went for my appointment with dear doctor..guess what, still not ovulated..and the follicle is now at 42mm = 4.2 cm!!! Ya Allah ..I'm worried sick..and the other follicle turned out to be 30mm..

So doctor still gave me  HCG injection just to rupture the follicle...if cyst..then all I can do is pray for 'her' to shrink naturally...if it stayed there......* I don't want to think that yet..it will drive me crazy..


Moving on, I will just get over my remaining treatment...which is:

• Day21: Bloodtest for progesterone
• Checking my so-called cyst on next menstrual cycle ..to ensure the cyst is totally gone..

Deep in my heart..I really hope both follicle are not cyst...if they are...I pray to Allah..make it go away..shrink them ..please...

So, after got HCG shot..terdetik hati  to measure my weight...

I gained 5 kgs within 1 month!! Dafuqq!!

Total gained after my 1st miscarriage back in April 2012 is 17kg...apa ni...!!!!! Sedih sangat....

Brenda,

I felt so devastated...I cried and cried...thinking what just happened to me..?? why I need to go through this..??

It makes me give up in everything...I don't feel like going out..I cried, called Mr. Harvey and channeled my anger at him...and of course he's won't comfort me at all..that's not his thing..comforting me when I'm down..

All he said

"Abang tengok okay je...nnt kita work out sama2 ok.."

just that.....arghhh...

So now, this coming  four month from Jan till April..I need to lose major weight...My aim is 15kg...so it takes about 3-4kg per month..equals to 1kg each week without fail.. I hope it won't be THAT hard cause I have tendency of reducing weight rapidly...used to lost 32kgs within 6-7months..but that was 9 years ago..Yes I was really FAT!!..87kgs nobody looked at me or wanted to take me as gf..kesian kan...but eventually managed to reduce my weight to 54kgs. lepas tu berderet abang senior nak queue..heh..douchebag semua..puih!!

....anyway reducing it needs a lot of   HARDWORK...I drank a lot f water...3.5liters a day and not taking white rice for almost 1 year...just protein food, vegies and fruits like apples, orange, grapefruit...and Milo  drink (pure Milo..no sugar or sweet milk).. twice a day just to make me have an energy at day..

NOWWW.......baru je bought some tools to assist me in getting started with cardio...not tools per se.. 

There are:

#1: Three Aerobic CDs and power dance

#2: Resistance rope, and 

#3: 6lbs of dumbell..

Cost me around around RM198.70

The Items

Cost me RM59.70

Cost me RM 139.00

So behold...I am restraining myself from facing any breakdown and downfall...I already cried and enough of having those ugly puffy eyes..

6 days late for my resolution...hope its not THAT late..

My 2013 resolution:
1- Reduce my weight until achieved ideal BMI measurement (4months)
2- Continue my treatment after getting ideal BMI ..will jump straight to IVF
3- Not taking any carbohydrate food especially white rice..*replace with brown rice..only to be taken once a month..
4- Saving money and put it under 'fertility account'  will be using this for my IVF this coming June 2013
5- Makes my hubby happier and fatter... :D ha ha ha....*I mean it!!


For this 4 months.. I hope I won't dicuss anything related to pregnancy...except finishing the bloodtest and cast away the cyst...

Next post will be sharing on my daily routine to lose my 17kgs...*Harap2 boleh lose la kan!!


See ya Brenda..wait for my transformation...*Pray hard


xoxo